so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
