R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
His nipple licking is glorious
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