i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize
