Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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