I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
only if we run a train.
done.
He kissed a someone with a penis
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
where are my eyebrows?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
