I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
