Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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