OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
