bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
