At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
