dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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