I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
