He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
