i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Randomize