I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
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