Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
How's work?
Spinning.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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