question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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