Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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