im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Randomize
