The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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