it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
So squirting runs in the family.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Randomize
