Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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