I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
it's not cheating when I paid for it
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize