She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
