Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
