let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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