I forgot how hot balto sounded
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
