Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
