So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
