I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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