it hurts more in the daytime
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
