you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
