What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
