We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
