What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
