I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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