just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
