I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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