Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
