i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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