she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
