god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
