we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
