I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
