Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
