you lied. pity sex is amazing.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
