Just fell off a train. Bad.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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