Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
