Duck Duck Cougar?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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