we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
